What My Kids Are Teaching Me During the COIVD-19 Pandemic

I have four children, who range in age from nine to 16. For the last four+ weeks, they have not left the house.

It’s been an interesting time, for all of us. They have the same parents. They are all living in the same environment. They are eating the same food, experiencing the same stress, hearing the same news. And of course, their scientist mother is thinking: perfect case study. 

Yet they are processing these stressful times, and challenges of not leaving their home, not going to school, not seeing friends or doing sports, very, very differently.

My introverts are becoming more introverted. I have to draw them out of their rooms, and remind them they have siblings and parents.

My extroverts are becoming frustrated seeing the same people over and over. I am having to remind them to use this time for self-investment.

There have been tears. Fights. Laughter. Sighs. More tears. While each of my children react differently, this much is true: there is validity to each of their experiences. 

All of them are disappointed. They are missing soccer regional play offs, a high school soccer season, dance competitions and more soccer tournaments. They are missing birthday parties, pool parties, vacations, and trips they’ve worked hard to earn. 

They are teaching me a lot. 

They’ve taught me every one of us will display stress differently. Each of us is experiencing different stressors right now. As a doctor, some of my friends are working nonstop treating patients. They are exhausted. Other colleagues have been furloughed, or had to let go of their own staff and feel enormous grief. Some have lost loved ones. Most of us, like you, are working in unknown situations, and then coming home to break up fights and help with math. 

We are all going through stresses and different emotions, even those of us who have seemingly similar jobs and live in similar environments. The way we process change, isolation, grief, disappointment is different, and each way is valid. Each person has merit. We are all a beautiful tapestry of different people, with distinctive traits…and hurts.

My kids are teaching me to respect an individual’s expression of stress during these uncertain times. They are also teaching me that it is ok to laugh. It is ok to find joy. Everyone is processing things differently, and what bothers one person may not affect another at in the same way. 

My kids are teaching me grace. To give grace to myself, and grace to others. We are in unchartered waters. These are uncertain times. But what we can know for sure, is grace always works. 

More grace. 

Doctor’s orders.